The Miller's Tale

"The Miller's Tale" (Middle English: The Milleres Tale) is the second of Geoffrey Chaucer's Canterbury Tales (1380s–1390s), told by the drunken miller Robin to "quite" (requite) "The Knight's Tale". The Miller's Prologue is the first "quite" that occurs in the tales (to "quite" someone is to repay them for a service, the service here being the telling of stories).

The general prologue to The Canterbury Tales describes the Miller, Robin, as a stout and evil churl fond of wrestling. In the Miller's Prologue, the pilgrims have just heard and enjoyed "The Knight's Tale", a classical story of courtly love, and the host asks the Monk to "quite" ("follow" or "repay") with a tale of his own. However, the Miller insists on going next. He claims that his tale is "noble", but reminds the other pilgrims that he is quite drunk and cannot be held accountable for what he says. He explains that his story is about acarpenter and his wife, and how a clerk "hath set the wrightes cappe" (that is, fooled the carpenter). Osewold the Reeve, who had originally been a carpenter himself, protests that the tale will insult carpenters and wives, but the Miller carries on anyway.

"The Miller's Tale" begins the trend in which succeeding tellers "quite" the previous one with their story. In a way the Miller requites the "Knight's Tale", and is himself directly requited with "The Reeve's Tale", in which the Reeve follows Robin's insulting story about a carpenter with his own tale disparaging a miller.

"The Miller's Tale" is the story of a carpenter, his lovely wife, and the two clerks (students) who are eager to get her into bed. The carpenter, John, lives in Oxford with his much younger wife, Alisoun, who is something of a local beauty. To make a bit of extra money, John rents out a room in his house to a clever scholar named Nicholas, who has taken a liking to Alisoun. Another scholar in the town, Absolon the parish clerk, also has his eye on Alisoun.

The action begins when John makes a day trip to a nearby town. While he is gone, Nicholas convinces Alisoun to have sex with him, and hence begins their affair. Shortly afterward, Alisoun goes to church, where Absolon sees her and immediately falls in love. He tries to win Alisoun's sexual favours by singing love songs under her window during the full moon and taking a part in the local play to try to get her attention. Alisoun rebuffs all his efforts, however, for she's already involved with Nicholas.

Nicholas, meanwhile, longs to spend a whole night in Alisoun's arms rather than just the few moments they have managed to steal when John isn't around. With Alisoun, he hatches a scheme that will enable him to do this. He convinces John that God is about to send a great flood like the one he sent in Noah's time. He says that God told him they could save themselves by hanging three large tubs from the ceiling to sleep in. Once the waters rose, they would cut the ropes and float away. John believes him and duly climbs into his tub. He thinks Nicholas and Alisoun are doing the same, but in fact, they are spending the night together in John's bed.

That same night, Absolon comes and begs Alisoun to give him a kiss. At first she refuses him, but she finally appears to give in. Instead of presenting her lips to Absolon's, though, she sticks her backside out the bedroom's "shot-window" (privy vent), and Absolon kisses her "ers" in the dark. Angry at being fooled, Absolon gets a red-hot coulter from the smith with which he intends to burn Alisoun. When he returns, though, Nicholas sticks his backside out to get in on the joke and breaks wind in Absolon's face. Absolon thrusts the coulter "amidst the ers" of Nicholas who cries out for "Water!" to assuage the pain.

The screams waking John, he thinks the flood is upon them and cuts the rope attaching him to the ceiling, thus sending him crashing to the floor. The townspeople hear the racket, rush to the scene, and, upon hearing Nicholas' and Alisoun's version of events, laugh at poor John and consider him mad.

The tale is replete with word-puns. Much is made of variations on "priv-" implying both secret things and private parts. Nicholas fondles Alisoun's "queynte", a noun, while Absolom is described after his humiliation as having his ardour "yqueynt" or quenched.

The Miller's name is intended as a pun on the phrase "rob 'em".^{[citation needed]} As told in the Reeve's Tale the Miller is a not just a bully but a thief of grain he is supposed to grind for his customers.